Engaged and Happy

It's hard to believe it and I still have to pinch myself every morning I wake up and look over next to me and see Craig, the love of my life, laying next to me, and then I look down at my ring finger and see this amazing, sparkling diamond ring in that space that has always lay empty. "I'm engaged and I'm going to mary my best friend" I whisper to myself and smile. It's been an amazing 20 moths getting to know Craig and falling in love with him more every day, and as we embark on this new adventure, I know I have a solid rock to ground me when I'm off my rocker, and comfort me when I'm sad, and make me smile when I'm grumpy. It's going to be amazing and I can't wait!

Let's take a look at how we got to this moment in time...

Craig and I met playing kickball. It's a funny story and I love to tell people that the first time we met I was yelling and screaming at him for making a game losing call when reffing our kickball game. I always say, he saw me at my worst, so it can only get better from there.

He came to watch one of my games when we first started dating and met my Mom. They seemed to hit it off instantly.

Our first date was an all day event. He invited me to the Charger/Raider game in San Diego the day after Halloween. We had a great time getting to know each other on the long car ride down there and I felt safe with him even when all the fans starting getting crazy.

I could tell on the way home that he wasn't feeling great. He was quiet and seemed to be a bit feverish. He went to the doctor the next day and it turns out that he had pneumonia! I told him that I would come over that night and make him some chili and we could watch a movie and relax. He told me later that that was the moment he fell in love with me. :)

From that moment on we were inseparable. We spent the upcoming Holidays together and went on our first vacation together to Santa Barbara. We ended the year with a new year's eve kiss and welcomed 2011 with open arms.

SANTA BARBARA

When our first Valentine's Day rolled around I was very excited to see what he would do for me. Something sweet, romantic, exotic, caring? What would it be!? He told me he had something planned for me but he wanted it to be a surprise. A couples massage? A horseback ride? I had all sorts of ideas running through my head. We had a nice romantic dinner at home the night before and after a little wine he accidently let it slip. SKYDIVING!!!! WHATTT!!!?

VALENTINE'S DINNER

SKYDIVING

He told me that he had chosen skydiving for our activity because he has a fear of heights and wanted to face his biggest fear with me by his side. (aaaaahhhh, so sweet). We both survived, obviously, the most terrifying moment of our lives, and we laughed and smiled the rest of the day just thinking about what crazy people we are.

The year rolled on and we celebrated birthdays and holidays and grew more and more in love.

He came as my guest on my Gold Cup trip the island of Lana'i and we extended our stay and spent time with his sister Tracie and her husband Kirk on the Big Island. Spending 10 days together is a test of any relationship and it was the best 10 days of my life. We enjoyed every moment together.

LANA'I

We realized how much we love to travel together and our shared love of "getting out of town".

MAMMOTH

VEGAS

BAKERSFIELD

HAVASU

CABO

(we lost all of our pictures from Cabo due to a faulty memory card)

CAMPING IN THE SIERRAS

BIG BEAR

Gold Cup came around again and I was in the running to win for the third year in a row. I thought it was a long shot but I ended up finishing #3 in the region. We were both particularly happy about this year because the trip was to the Four Seasons in Kona, our favorite island.

Craig's mom and step-dad invited us to come out four day early and stay with them in their time share on Kauai. Um, yes please.

We spent the first couple days touring around the island with Francie and Scott and relaxing at the beach. Our last day on the island before leaving for Kona, Craig and I signed up for a kayaking tour up the Wailua river and a hike into the jungle to see Secret Falls. I had seen people kayaking on the river the last time I was in Kauai and really wanted to do that before we left.

It was a beautiful day, not too hot, not too cloudy. The kayaking was fun and the hike through the jungle was more challenging and muddy than I had thought (but still a lot of fun).

When we finally reached the falls, it was amazing! It had rained for almost a week straight so it was really dumping water. Craig and I found a rock in the middle of the stream in front of the waterfall to sit and eat our lunch. We were about half way through our sandwiches when Craig handed me his and proceeded to dig through the backpack. "What are you looking for? Can't you finish your sandwich first." I'm nagging him to quit looking for whatever it is he is looking for and I look into the bag to help him find it and I see him pulling up out of the bottom of the bag a blue box with a white ribbon around it!

Its hard to describe the feeling but it was a shock that ran through my body and everything went a little blurry. I remember laughing and smiling and thinking to myself, "this is really happening!"

He got in front of me and bent down on his knee. He said something like "You know I love you, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you mary me?" And he opened the box. OMG! All i saw was sparkle. It blew me away and I teared up.

"OF COURSE, YES!" I said. I was shaking all over.

The last 6 weeks has been great. Sharing our story with everyone, making wedding plans, and just enjoying being engaged. We are so excited to exchange vows in Cabo next year in April in front of our family and friends. Each and every day is better than the next and I know that I have so much more to look forward to in the future.

I love you Craig.

The Joys and Sorrows of Dieting

As some of you may have noticed, or maybe no one, I'm not sure anyone even reads my blog, but I have had a Wedding Day Slim Down countdown on my blog going for a month before my sister's wedding. This slim down was not out of vanity but out of pure necessity. When my bride's maid dress arrived it was way too tight. I could barely get it zipped up and it was definitely not going to be comfortable to wear all night at a wedding. As we all know, there is no way to make a dress bigger so the only solution was to make my body smaller.

I embarked on a weight loss mission to get into that dress and feel comfortable in it was well. My plan was as follows.

1) work out or run every day

2) no carbs for lunch or dinner

3) only grilled or steamed vegetables and meat

4) limited alcohol (I tried to cut it out completely but that was just way too hard)

5) keep a calendar with my workout for the day already on it so I am prepared for what is in store for me that day based on my work schedule

I was astonished at how quickly my body changed by just cutting out the carbs. As difficult as it was in the beginning to resist the bread, pasta and rice, it became much easier as the time went by. I was filling my tummy with extra steamed broccoli or more salad and not with processed, bleached and nutrient void carbohydrates. I was never hungry and had a lot more energy and a lot less bloat. Along with the change in diet I was also working out daily doing both strength training and cardio. The weight just melted off. I was down 9 pounds from my heaviest point in only 3 weeks.

I tried the dress on at the beginning of last week and it zipped up easily, the problem now was that it was a little too big! Craziness! With a strapless bra in place, it fit perfectly. I was very proud of myself and so was Craig. He was quite impressed with my new figure as well.

So as great as I felt and as pleased with the results as I was, I was definitely enjoying my huge plate of cheese tortellini at the wedding. A diet as strict as what I was doing is impossible to keep up with forever, nor should it be. Diets are just that, diets. They are not meant to be long term. Developing a healthy lifestyle and making better decisions about what goes into my body is much more realistic. I still plan on keeping up with not eating carbs for dinner at least 5 nights a week, I just could never imagine a life without risotto or mashed potatoes, and working out 3-4 days a week as well. I have also discovered that I am capable of a morning workout, which for me is a 3 mile run on the treadmill at the gym here in my complex, and it is much easier to get it out of the way before my day begins rather that waiting to see how I feel at the end of a long work day.

Overall, here are the lessons learned from this experience:

1) our bodies are a direct result of what we put in it

2) having a goal to work towards is much more motivating

3) diets are a temporary fix and impossible to stick to 100% of the time, but keeping a few healthy habits from being on one is a good idea

4) exercise is important, but the combination of diet and exercise is the only way to get fast results

New Recipes for the Cold Days Ahead

Last weekend Craig and I went camping up near Mammoth. In anticipation of the frigid nights, I wanted to make us something warm and hearty to eat around the campfire. We had just made a trip to Costco and came home with a pre-cooked roasted chicken so I wanted to use this in the recipe so it wouldn't go to waste. Here is what I ended up making:

Chicken and white bean chili

• 5 fresh Anaheim chilies
• 1 fresh poblano chili

3 cans white beans (i used 2 white beans, one pinto)

• 2 tbsp butter
• 1 large onion, chopped
• 1/3 cup all purpose flour
• 4 cups low-salt chicken broth
• 1 small container half and half
• 1 whole roasted chicken shredded
• 1 tablespoon chili powder
• 1 tablespoon hot pepper sauce
• 1 tablespoon ground cumin
• 2 teaspoons salt
• 1/2 teaspoon white pepper (black pepper is fine too)

Garnish

• 1 1/2 cups grated Monterey Jack cheese (about 6 ounces)
• 1 cup sour cream
• Chopped fresh cilantro
• Purchased tomatillo or green chili salsa

Cook the chopped onions in the butter for a few minutes then add the flour. Stir and cook for another minute.

Roast the peppers under the broiler or on the grill until they are black on the outside. Place them in a bowl and cover with plastic wrap. Let them sit for a few minutes then remove and peel skins off. Chop.

Add chicken broth and half and half and stir well to incorporate the flour onion mix. Let simmer for 10 minutes.

Add remaining ingredients and just let it cook, stirring occasionally.

Garnish with cheese, sour cream, cilantro, and tomatillo salsa. This is seriously delicious!

Enjoying my chili by the fire. We toasted bread sticks by the fireside and were excellent to dip!

Yesterday I got home from a wild weekend in Palm Spings and plopped myself down on the couch to relax. I looked through my list of recorded shows and checked out what Tyler Florence had made on the most recent episode of Tyler's Ultimate. He was making Cioppino, which happens to be one of my FAVORITE things in the world. The cioppino at Brophy Bros in Santa Barbara is a meal I literally dream about and crave on a daily basis. The recipe Tyler was making was a little too technical for me (ie using whole dungess crabs and blending chorizo sausage in a food processor for the base of the broth) but the idea of cioppino was already making my mouth water. I quickly logged on to Epicurious.com, my favorite site for recipes, and found a quick and highly rated recipe. Here it is:

QUICK AND EASY CIOPPINO

1 fennel bulb, stalks discarded and bulb cut lengthwise into 6 wedges

1/2 cup sliced mushrooms

1 medium onion, quartered

3 garlic cloves, smashed and peeled

3 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil

2 Turkish bay leaves or 1 California

1 1/2 teaspoons dried thyme

1 teaspoon dried oregano

1 teaspoon dried hot red-pepper flakes (recipe calls for 1/8 tsp but I like it spicy)

1 (28-ounce) can crushed tomatoes in juice (use San Marzano tomatoes if you can find them, they really make the difference)

1 1/2 cups water

1 cup full-bodied red wine such as Zinfandel or Syrah

1 (8-ounce) bottle clam juice

1/2 pound skinless fillets of thick white-fleshed fish such as halibut, hake, or pollack, cut into 2-inch chunks

1/2 pound cultivated mussels

1/2 pound shrimp

1/2 cup small scallops

Pulse fennel, onion, and garlic in a food processor until coarsely chopped.

Heat oil in a 5- to 6-quart heavy pot over medium-high heat until it shimmers, then stir in chopped vegetables, bay leaves, thyme, red-pepper flakes, 1 1/2 teaspoons salt, and 1/2 teaspoon black pepper.

Cook, covered, over medium heat, stirring once or twice, until vegetables begin to soften, about 4 minutes.

Add tomatoes with their juice, water, wine, and clam juice and boil, covered, 20 minutes. Stir in seafood and cook, uncovered, until fish is just cooked through and mussels open wide, 4 to 6 minutes (discard any that remain unopened after 6 minutes). Discard bay leaves

Being Healthy

I'm sure like many of you, over the holidays I kind of over did it in the food department: candy, snacks, junk food, booze, second helpings, third helpings, late night helpings, you get the idea. To compound the fact that I was eating like Nadia Suleman pregnant with 8 children, I had been avoiding working out as well.

But with the new year came the new resolution to get my life back on track. I wouldn't call it a resolution so much as a redirection, or a re-acquaintance with my old life. Starting over the last few weeks I've made an effort to exercise at least 3 times a week, shooting for 4, and filling my diet with healthier, more nutritious foods. I've printed out a calendar and hung it on my fridge along with the class workout schedule for all the 24 hour fitness gyms in a few mile radius. I fill in each day what I've accomplished, or what I hope to accomplish that day. If I do nothing that day, I fill it in with a big fat "0". I don't like "0"s.

When it comes to eating healthier it is much easier when you can control what you are consuming, so for me that meant a lot more eating at home. Being in a new relationship, we tend to eat out a lot, drink a lot of wine, and do a lot of snuggling on the couch; not very conducive to a healthy lifestyle, so to be fully on board I had to get Craig on board as well. Lucky for me, he was all for it.

The last few weeks we've been cooking a lot together and have been really satisfied with some of our creations. Here are some of my favorites that I hope you guys will try as well.

• Salmon with Orange, Hoisin, and Vegetables

This recipe is really easy, has no oil or extra fat besides what is in the fish, and is the easiest cleanup ever! The recipe I used calls for bok choy which I love, but you can easily substitute any other vegetables like spinach, bell peppers, or asparagus. Here is the link to the recipe:

http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/Salmon-with-Hoisin-Orange-and-Bok-Choy-356309

• Pork-chops stuffed with goat cheese, sundried tomatoes and spinach

I got this recipe from Giada and I totally questioned the healthiness of this dish, but the cheese is pretty minimal in the stuffing, and we can't totally deny ourselves when being healthy. It's about being balanced.

The pan sauce for these is really delicious too and super easy to make. Once you learn how to do this you can make this sauce with anything you cook in a pan, chicken, fish, pork, even vegetables. Here is the link for this recipe:

http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/giada-de-laurentiis/pork-chops-stuffed-with-sun-dried-tomatoes-and-spinach-recipe/index.html

• Beef Braised in Red Wine and Veggies

Ok, so this one is not super healthy either but when you think about how much food you are making and there is only 2 tbsp of olive oil in it, it really isn't that bad. And believe me, this is delicious!

For this recipe I used a bag of baby carrots which I put in towards the end. It makes the dish more nutritious and serves as a great side dish. You don't have to use the polenta as a side, but wow is it amazing together. Here is the link for this recipe:

http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/Beef-Braised-in-Red-Wine-236986

• Kerry's 3 Bean Turkey Chili

This is my own recipe for chili that I make ALL THE TIME! I love it. With the lean protein from the turkey, the fiber from the beans, vitamin C in the bell peppers, lycopene from the tomatoes, its just delicious and nutritious.

• 1 package lean ground turkey
• 1 large red bell pepper chopped
• 2 cloves garlic chopped
• 1 onion, chopped
• 1 jalapeno, chopped (seeds and veins removed if you don't like it too spicy)
• chili powder (1-2 tbsp depending on spice)
• 1 tbsp cumin
• red pepper flakes
• 1 tbsp taco or fajita seasoning
• 1 can black beans, drained and rinsed
• 1 can pinto beans, drained and rinsed
• 1 can kidney beans, drained and rinsed
• 1 large can diced tomatoes (with green chilies if you can find it, or add small can of diced green chilies)
• About 2-3 cups liquid, enough to cover the chili (I use chicken stock, beef stock, beer, water, etc... whatever you got on hand is fine)
• salt and pepper to taste

Directions: In a large cast iron pot, brown turkey in 1tbsp olive oil. Add onions, garlic, peppers, and jalapeno. Saute until tender. Add seasonings, cook for one or two minutes. Add can of tomatoes and stir. Add liquid to pot and stir all together. Cook covered for one hour on med-low heat. Cook uncovered for 1 hour, stirring occasionally, make sure it doesn't burn. Serve with shredded cheese on top. ENJOY!

• Other Healthy ideas:
• Grilled teriyaki chicken with shish-kebab veggie skewers: bell peppers, onions, mushrooms, and pineapple
• Roasted salmon with asparagus and caper lemon sauce: layer asparagus on roasting pan with olive oil, salt, pepper. lay salmon on top with same seasoning. make sauce with lemon, caper, shallots, olive oil. Top salmon with sauce and serve
• Chicken or shrimp stir-fry with asian vegetables, serve over brown rice. Sauce: soy, siracha, grated ginger, garlic, sesame oil, honey.

So here is to a healthy new year with a lot more exercising and a lot more eating at home. I love using the epicurious.com website as well as foodnetwork.com. I just type in the ingredients I have or what I am in the mood for and the sites will deliver a bunch of great, healthy ideas. Cook on my friends, cook on!

And more...

More from the last few months

Lana's bachelorette party, Thanksgiving football, House Warming Party,

UCLA game, Halloween

Update, Finally

Well, since my last post I have had a lot of exciting things happen in my life. So let's travel back in time and I'll give you a recap of what's up in K-Dogg's life.

October

October was a jam-packed month of excitement. First of all, I finally closed on my Condo. It was a bitter sweet moment because after 6 months of waiting for the short sale to go through, I ended up getting the keys to my new place less than 12 hours before

I was leaving for a weeklong vacation to Hawaii, which leads to the second exciting thing to happen this month.

As most of you know my trip to Hawaii was for winning my company's Gold Cup award. It included 5 days at the Grand Hyatt Kauai for me and a guest

(Jamie O'Day, lucky girl). The trip included all we could eat and drink and a plethora of amazing activities. I went on my first helicopter ride over the Napali coast, had an amazing hour long massage, went sailing on a catamaran and snorkled on the Napali coast, drove ar

ound the island looking for waterfalls, swinging into a pond off a rope swing, jumping off a waterfall...the list goes on and on. We were spoiled beyond belief.

Upon my return I had the daunting task of moving into my new place. After living in the same place for 3 years, there was a lot to sift through and toss out. Not to mention I had a whole house of furniture to buy. It was a lot of work and a very stressful time but in the end it was totally worth all the blood, sweat and tears.

The third amazing thing that happened in October resulted from my choice to play in a kickball league. Who'd have guessed, but yes, I found love at kickball. His name is Craig and he is great. This is how we met....

It was the week before my half marathon (oh yeah! I almost forgot about that! I ran a half marathon too! 2 hours 8 minutes, yea me! ) and I was having a pretty bad day. I was very stressed out and just not in a good mood. At my kickball game that night I was not drinking since I had my race in less than a week, and it just so happened that we were playing the nastiest, rudest, most obnoxious team in the league. It came down to the last play and the ref made a questionable call the ended the game and resulted in our loss. To put it bluntly, I lost it! I was in the ref's face yelling at him, hitting him with the ball, really giving it to him. Totally not my style. Well, the ref was Craig. The next week I made it a point to find this poor ref and apologize to him for my appalling behavior. I explained to him that I had had a bad day and wrongfully took it out on him and that I was very sorry. The whole time I was talking he was just standing there smiling, and when I was finished he said it was ok, he forgave me and asked if I was going to the bar after.

We hit it off from there on and have really enjoyed getting to know each other the last few months.

2007, seems so long ago...

Reasons you KNOW you are now an adult... shit!

1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.

2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.

3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.

4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.

5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator.

6. You watch the Weather Channel.

7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "break
up."

8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.

9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."

10. You're the one calling the police because the *%$&@#! kids next door won't turn down the stereo.

11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.

12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.

13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.

14. You feed your
dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers.

15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.

16. You take naps.

17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.

18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3 AM would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.

19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.

20. A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good shit."

21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.

22. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going to drink that much again."

23. 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real
work.

24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.

25. When you find out your friends are pregnant you congratulate them instead of asking "Oh no, what the hell happened?"

Bonus:

26: You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign
that doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry
old ass. Then you forward it to a bunch of old friends 'cause you know they'll enjoy it & do the same

Some random thoughts to make you smile

These quotes came from one of those forwarded emails so I'm not sure who actually wrote this, but read through them, and you will find at least 10 that you can relate to. I highlighted my favs.

-More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about
is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's
not only better, but also more directly involves me.

-Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're
wrong.

-I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to have
fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and sticks when
they've invented the lighter?

-Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're going in the
complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead
of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you
have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm
gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area
thinks you're crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.

-That's enough, Nickelback.

-I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

-Is it just me, or are 80% of the people in the "people you may know" feature on
Facebook people that I do know, but I deliberately choose not to be friends
with?

-Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't work? You
take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem.
Every kid in America did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem?
There was no internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured it out.
Today's kids are soft.

-There is a great need for sarcasm font.

-Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly
realize I had no idea what the f was going on when I first saw it.

-How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

-I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2
trips to bring my groceries in.

- I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your
computer history if you die.

-The only time I look forward to a red light is when I trying to finish a text.

- A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the spread of
mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it.

- Was learning cursive really necessary?

- Lol has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say".

- I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

- Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear
is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".

- How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile
because you still didn't hear what they said?

- I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to
prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!

- Every time I have to spell a word over the phone using 'as in' examples, I
will undoubtedly draw a blank and sound like a complete idiot. Today I had to
spell my boss's last name to an attorney and said "Yes that's G as in...(10
second lapse)..ummm...Goonies"

- While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively
swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.

- MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how
to get out of my neighborhood.

- Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person
died.

- I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower
first and THEN turn on the water.

- I would like to officially coin the phrase 'catching the swine flu' to be used
as a way to make fun of a friend for hooking up with an overweight woman.
Example: "Dave caught the swine flu last night."

-I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

- Bad decisions make good stories.

-Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is
public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the Red Ryder BB gun
that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if I do!

-If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring would probably
just be completely invisible.

-Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and
say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know
my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't be a problem....

-You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when
you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive for the
rest of the day.

-Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want to have
to restart my collection.

-There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die
after leaning your chair back a little too far.

-I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want
to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did not make
any changes to.

- "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.

-I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Dammit!), but
when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd
you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

- I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone
of importance the entire day. What a waste.

-When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't
already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.

-I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle, then I like
about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.

-Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for
pedophiles...

- As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no
matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

-Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know
what time it is.

-I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer
when they call.

-Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do to with it.

-Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a
pocket, hitting the G-spot, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I bet my
ass everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7
seconds, eyes closed, first time every time...

-My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if
you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?

-I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

-I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night
more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.

-The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw they had
included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words, someone at the
restaurant packed my order, took a second to think about it, and then estimated
that there must be at least four people eating to require such a large amount of
food. Too bad I was eating by myself. There's nothing like being made to feel
like a fat bastard before dinner